She just doesn't want a relationship and casual sex is not a good option, she says, because "girls can't have flings without being judged". They don't seem concerned. Emi Kuwahata, 23, and her friend, Eri Asada, 22, meet me in the shopping district of Shibuya. Tomita has a job she loves in the human resources department of a French-owned bank. Kuwahata, a fashion graduate, is in a casual relationship with a man 13 years her senior. Of the estimated 13 million unmarried people in Japan who currently live with their parents, around three million are over the age of But what endless Japanese committees have failed to grasp when they stew over the country's procreation-shy youth is that, thanks to official shortsightedness, the decision to stay single often makes perfect sense. Their chances of remaining childless are even higher: The country is undergoing major social transition after 20 years of economic stagnation.
Secretly, he loved baking cakes, collecting "pink sparkly things" and knitting clothes for his stuffed animals. Aoyama believes the country is experiencing "a flight from human intimacy" — and it's partly the government's fault. Of the estimated 13 million unmarried people in Japan who currently live with their parents, around three million are over the age of Nor is growing preoccupation with digital technology. They assume I'm desperate because I'm single. Cohabiting or unmarried parenthood is still unusual, dogged by bureaucratic disapproval. I go out with my girl friends — career women like me — to French and Italian restaurants. The World Economic Forum consistently ranks Japan as one of the world's worst nations for gender equality at work. Aoyama's first task with most of her clients is encouraging them "to stop apologising for their own physical existence". Some experts believe the flight from marriage is not merely a rejection of outdated norms and gender roles. He defines it as "a heterosexual man for whom relationships and sex are unimportant". Its population of million , which has been shrinking for the past decade, is projected to plunge a further one-third by Although there has long been a pragmatic separation of love and sex in Japan — a country mostly free of religious morals — sex fares no better. But he also believes the rest of the world is not far behind. Japanese men have become less career-driven, and less solvent, as lifetime job security has waned. But demographer Nicholas Eberstadt argues that a distinctive set of factors is accelerating these trends in Japan. In her business pamphlet, she offers up the gloriously random confidence that she visited North Korea in the s and squeezed the testicles of a top army general. The phenomenon emerged a few years ago with the airing of a Japanese manga-turned-TV show. Romantic commitment seems to represent burden and drudgery, from the exorbitant costs of buying property in Japan to the uncertain expectations of a spouse and in-laws. I love my independence. Amid the recession and unsteady wages, men like Kishino feel that the pressure on them to be breadwinning economic warriors for a wife and family is unrealistic. Inside, she takes me upstairs to her "relaxation room" — a bedroom with no furniture except a double futon. Tomita has a job she loves in the human resources department of a French-owned bank. She berates the government for "making it hard for single people to live however they want" and for "whipping up fear about the falling birth rate". It could be a long-term state of affairs.
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Is She Going too Far?
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